Where Are All the Young People?

Recently our Church Planting and Replanting residents took field trips on a Sunday morning. They visited 2 different churches who have been in decline for years. We asked them to make observations of everything from website and signage to how they were received as visitors, what the music was like, and how gospel centered the sermon was. They were to approach the morning as if they were truly seeking a church home.
Their report was sad, revealing, and seem to be common in many declining churches.

As I was reading an article recently from churchleaders.com (see below), I was reminded that in both of the churches our residents visited there was a clear absence of young people. While the article below may specifically apply to younger generations, I believe it also applies to all generations on some level. Below each of the “8 Things That Keep Young People in Church,” I have added My Thoughts.

There are reasons that young people and people in general aren’t attending dying churches and it often isn’t because they are bad people seeking the wrong things. Often it is because our churches aren’t really offering the things that matter most.

8 Things That Keep Young People in Church

By Chuck Lawless -
March 7, 2020

It’s no secret that many college-age students who were raised in church drop out once they’re on their own. On the other hand, some churches have done a good job of keeping and reaching this group. Here’s what I see that keeps young people in church:

1. Genuine relationships. First, they have strong relationships with others their own age. Second, they have a ministry leader they respect and from whom they want to learn. Third—and perhaps most importantly—they have relationship with older adults. Young people long for older mentors and models, and the church that offers these relationships will be a magnet for young people.

   • My Thoughts.
     We were created for relationship with other people. We were created for community. In both churches visited, the residents reported that they were more ignored than welcomed. If there was any sort of interaction, it was largely superficial and only happened in passing.

     Did you know that some church gurus say that visitors generally show up to church fifteen minutes early and make a decision on whether or not they will return within the first six minutes of arriving? Before they ever hear the music or the preacher, most visitors have already decided whether you will see them again. While there are several contributing factors to this decision, one of them is RELATIONSHIPS. How well were they welcomed? Was it superficial? Did the people seem genuinely glad to see them? Could this be a place where they could fit in, be loved, cared for, mentored? Or do they feel like an outsider, OK’d for a visit, but not really family?

     At New City we talk about this very thing weekly! We press our folks to remember how Jesus welcomed them. Think of the story of the Prodigal Son, how excited the father was that his son had come home. Visitors are distant family members or maybe, not yet family members who should be welcomed just as we have been welcomed in Christ! And it doesn’t end with a “good morning.” In Christ we are family, so we should pursue the people who come our way like they really are family.

2. Deep theology. This generation isn’t interested in watered-down, weak theology. They’re especially not interested in churches that ignore theology. Rather, they want to think deeply and discuss theology with others who can help them think through their positions.

   • My Thoughts.
     Our residents reported that in one church they visited there was no tangible application of the Scripture made to the listeners lives and very little theology explained. There was, however a movie clip!

     In the second church there was a great deal of Scripture but it came with a call to conservatism, being a republican and not a democrat and no real call to trust in the amazing work of Jesus. The application in the second church was not an application of biblical theology but of the Law and morality and connected to American politics.

     It isn’t just “Deep Theology” that is desired and needed but deep theology applied to life. How does this truth change how I live my life? If this really is who God is and what he has done for me, how does my faith in that impact the way I live? What do these truths mean in relation to the events we witness everyday?

     It is hard to cover all of those things in a single sermon and answer questions while making individual applications. OK, it is impossible! That is why we use the sermon and Scripture taught each week as the basis for our Missional Community (MC) discussion! In MC we can ask those difficult questions of one another and our leader. We can unpack not just deep theology, but unpack it in an applicational way.

     It isn’t just younger generations that long for this kind of teaching and interaction. Almost every week I am approached by older adults who share how much they value what they are learning not only on Sunday mornings, but also in their MC.

     Churches don’t have to share the Missional Community model, but there should be a place where we are challenged by one another to not only know the Word but also to apply it to our lives and our lives to hIs Word.

3. Hands-on opportunities. Christian service, to this group, means much more than just attending church and putting dollars in the offering plate; it means actually ministering somehow to make a difference in somebody’s life. If young people can’t get their hands dirty in taking the gospel to hurting people, they’re not inclined to get on board.

   • My Thoughts.
     Here is where theology applied becomes real! If Jesus was a servant and we are being shaped into his image (sanctification), what does that make us? Servants!

     Churches should expect their people to serve! They should talk about serving and make every opportunity to serve known. This includes serving on Sunday mornings, serving in Missional Communities and serving where they live work and play! In addition, at New City, our Missional Communities form partnerships for mission in the city. Each MC member is expected to serve the community and city together. But here it is important that we connect our theology and practice! We serve because Jesus makes us servants, not because it is what good people do or what must be done to be loved and accepted.

     And it isn’t just serving opportunities that should be increased and expected; it is also leadership opportunities! The leadership table should always be growing. Young people have ideas and dreams and they are good ones! They are often willing to give their lives to the things that matter. As a church we need to provide more seats at the leadership table for those who are faithful!

4. Meaningful purpose. This generation can be selfish, but they can also be more interested in causes than other generations. Whether the issue is poverty, human trafficking, addiction, or any number of causes, young people want to take on issues bigger than themselves.

   • My Thoughts.
     YES!! This goes along with #3. Young people often do not want to sit on the sidelines and they don’t want to be a part of a sideline sitting church. They see the story of God in the Old and New Testaments and especially the life of Jesus as God’s people involved - and that’s what they want! They want to be involved. They want to make a difference. They want to be a part of a church that is working to make a difference.

5. Honest answers. Today’s young people don’t simply accept the theology of their home church. They question it all, but usually not without a willingness to learn. They want a church that recognizes their questions, respects their struggles, offers well thought-out responses, and says “I don’t know” when necessary.

   • My Thoughts.
     See 1-4 above! Theology applied. Engaging relationships. Life changed by the truth of the gospel. A life bigger than work and church.

6. “Adopted” family. Here, I’m thinking particularly of young people who are geographically or emotionally distant from their families of origin. They’re looking for opportunities to be part of a family—to have dinner with them, to get to know their kids, to see how to love spouses and raise children, and to have a place of refuge when life gets overwhelming.

   • My Thoughts.
     Believing in Jesus makes us sons and daughters of God. We call sons and daughters who share a parent, brothers and sisters - family. We are family in Christ, not just “church family,” but FAMILY. We should live like we are family! And that is especially true for college students, but it is also true for those who are new to our city, those who come from broken homes, and all of us - because we were created for family! Family means doing life with the people God brings our way. It is messy. It can be difficult and painful. But it can also be incredibly beautiful.

     If your church is welcoming of visitors on a Sunday morning, no visitor will believe that they will stand a chance of becoming family there.

7. Pastoral support. My experience is that churches who keep young people have pastors who give them time and attention. They see the lead pastor not just as the “guy who preaches,” but as a friend they can approach when needed.

   • My Thoughts.
     New City is elder led. Our elders watch over and care for specific MCs. They are available to those leaders and MC members. Our elders are also a part of an MC. They are present. They aren’t stuffy theologians that you cannot talk to! They help. They council. They are accessible.

8. Global missions. The missionary heart in me is grateful to see this trend. Young people like both the adventure of travel and the faith-risk of going where others may not go. Churches that capitalize on this passion will attract and keep a young generation.

• My Thoughts.
  We know that we have been created for more than we see around us, more than lives of work + family + sleep and maybe a vacation here and there. Deep down we know that we were created to make a difference.

  Global missions is a great call, but I find at New City that our people are equally or maybe even more moved by the call on their every day life to be a missionary! Jesus has called each of us to be a part of building his eternal kingdom - not when we die, but here and now! We have an opportunity to change the face of eternity through our everyday lives and the people we are with at school, at work, at the park… We have an opportunity to see people moved from enemies of God to children of God. We have the opportunity to see marriages restored, addictions broken, sadness turned to joy. Our lives are bigger than us and bigger than the American dream!

  That is not just the life that young people want to live, it is the life we all want to be a part of because it is the life we were created for! The biggest “call” our residents experienced in their visits was the call to be conservative and vote republican. We simply must call God’s people to more - more than politics and social justice, more than good morals. We must call God’s people to life as missionaries with eternal consequences!
  (end article from leaders.com)

It is unfair to judge either church completely based on a single visit! Every pastor and every church has a bad day! We have plenty of them here (especially me!). These are not things that should be assessed based on one day.
But they are BIG things.
And they are things that should be assessed.
There are reasons churches are dying. Most often it isn’t because the people not coming are bad people seeking the wrong things. Very often it is because our churches aren’t really offering the things that matter most by being the people God has called us to be.

If you are a part of a struggling church and would like to help, we would love to talk to with you. We don’t pretend to have everything figured out, but maybe together we could figure a few things out. Your church is worth it and so are the thousands of people around you.